My Trust is No Longer Private

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The year my youngest son turned 10 I decided to give him an early birthday gift with a custom paint job for his bedroom. He was heading into the tween years and had finally formed opinions about what he liked as well as what he didn’t like. Instead of choosing something that would please his older brother, he chose a camouflage themed paint job…but not the typical hunter camo. He wanted what is known as ‘urban camo’ with shades of gray, black, and red. It was bold and more of a challenge than anything I had ever taken on before. My inner Martha accepted the challenge and I got to work. After several days of drawing the lines freehand, outlining and painting with a small brush, being very careful that no two colors were side by side, my decade worthy project finally emerged as the coolest tween bedroom makeover ever.

It looked like this:

Today I painted over it.

All the hard work and joint pain I endured two years ago vanished with two coats of ‘coffee with cream’ Glidden paint.  It only took a few hours to undo what originally took me a week to do.  Everything about today felt wrong even though I know it’s the right thing to do in order to sell our house.

As a mom I find it easier to trust God with my private stuff than with the stuff that spills over onto the rest of my family. It’s like I can organize my health issues, personal dreams, secret fears, and relationships into a file with my name on it. Nobody needs to worry about it. I’m taking care of it.

All of that changed this weekend when my private trust file spilled into the paint tray. This time trusting God along with my husband affects our family in a very visible way. This time there were late nights with tears because of so many unknowns and bedroom staging madness. This time I don’t have the reassuring rock solid answers that my kids depend on. My trusting is no longer private. It’s on display in hi-def and my boys are watching.

The Lord reminded me of a verse a few weeks ago that has become a promise for this season in our lives. Maybe you need a promise like this one too.

He tends his flock like a shepherd; He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; He gently leads those that have young.-Isaiah 40:11 NIV

He gently leads those that have young. That’s me. It’s you too if you find yourself responsible for children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, daycare kids, a classroom full of kids, etc.

He calls us by name and he leads us. (John 10:3)

Today I pray that we will be encouraged knowing that He will take good care of us, as well as those who are watching us, wherever He leads. I pray that we will experience the irrational peace that comes from knowing that He is good.