Self-Sufficiency Sucks

A couple of weeks ago I wrote a post about God’s faithfulness being enough for us every single day. My husband and I have been reading a book written by Mark Batterson called ‘The Circle Maker–Praying Circles Around Your Biggest Dreams and Greatest Fears”. It’s been so very helpful to have this book lately. Last night I was on the verge of (another) meltdown over the fact that I can’t get my living room to look like something out of a magazine so that someone will want to buy our house. My guys provided the grunt work to move the furniture where I thought it might work only to realize that it wouldn’t work at all. They were tired. I was beyond frustrated and getting angrier (not at them) by the second. The guys went downstairs for a much needed break from my insanity and I plopped myself down at the kitchen table with my Bible and this book.

Here’s some of what I read:

The Manna Miracle

When God provided the miraculous manna for the Israelites as they wandered in the wilderness, it says He provided “enough for that day.” Just enough. The language describing God’s provision is extremely precise. Those who gathered a lot had nothing left over, and those who gathered a little had enough. God provided just enough. Then He gave them a curious command: “Do not keep any of it until morning.”

So why does God provide just enough? Why would God forbid leftovers? What’s wrong with taking a little initiative and gathering enough manna for two days or two weeks?

Here’s my take on the manna miracle: The manna was a daily reminder of their daily dependence on God. God wanted to cultivate their daily dependence by providing for their needs on a daily basis. Nothing has changed. Isn’t that the point of the Lord’s Prayer? “Give us today our daily bread.”

We want a one-week or one-month or one-year supply of God’s provision, but God wants us to drop to our knees every day in raw dependence on Him. And God knows that if He provided too much too soon, we’d lose our spiritual hunger. He knows we’d stop trusting in our Provider and start trusting in provision.

One of our fundamental misunderstandings of spiritual maturity is thinking that it should result in self-sufficiency. It’s the exact opposite. The goal isn’t independence; the goal is codependence on God. Our desire for self-sufficiency is a subtle expression of our sinful nature. It’s a desire to get to a place where we don’t need God, don’t need faith, and don’t need to pray. We want God to provide more so we need Him less.—Mark Batterson, The Circle Maker

Having to pray and ask the Lord where I should put furniture to stage my living room seems a little well, ridiculous to me. I mean, you never see someone on HGTV stop and pray over the next home makeover, do you?!!! Why does it have to be so hard that I can’t even decorate a living room without Him? I’m a little embarrassed to even share this information with you because you’re probably an expert. But maybe there are places in your life right now where you don’t feel much like an expert…like things are way beyond your ability to control? Could it be that God is cultivating our daily dependence by providing only what we need on a daily basis? If we humble ourselves (stop kicking and screaming) long enough to ask for his help?

My prayer today is that we will gather enough of what we need today and simply let enough be enough. I want to trust the Provider more than the provision.

I’m depending on Him to help me with my living room puzzle today.

Where are you needing to depend on him for today?